The Day of the Furrowed Brow12:00 PM
Everyone has those days... when things are just bleh. Saturday was that kinda day for us. It's not everything was bad; it just wasn't all good. Not quite a frown. More like a constant furrowed brow.
It all started when on our way outta town (we were going on a road trip). First day of fishing season and that meant that there are alot of crazy old men on the road with pickup trucks. I do NOT exaggerate. Four times, we were almost hit by trucks going way too fast and the drivers not paying attention. I wanted to smack 'em all in the face, and take away their driver's licenses... after I stopped gripping the armrest 'til my knuckles were white. What is it with pickup truck drivers that makes them drive like crazies?
We stopped at a coffee shop. Which would've been great except the three Catholic girls sitting beside us that just had to talk quite loudly for 30 minutes about their sex lives (which should be nonexistent. Just sayin'). UGH and EW and REALLY?! Kinda ruined the experience.
We drove a total of six hours. Sacrificial driving, because Brandon shoulda been studying all day. But this is for family. So we drove from central Pennsylvania to just across the border of New York state. Brandon's little brother & his girlfriend are expecting a baby girl veeery soon, and so we went to deliver gifts and go to the baby shower. The bro-in-law had to work (yay for working, but not yay for missing a visit with him), so Brandon spent the time studying and I spent the time taking pictures of the mommy-to-be and socializing with people I've never met before. Always a bit of an uncomfortable stretch for this introvert. My method? Just keep smiling and no one knows that it's hard. :P
Long conversations on the way home about theology, practical Christianity, homogeneous ministry, excesses in the American church and how to make a difference. All the things that light my fire. I like talking about the big picture, but sometimes it's just too much and I'm like, WHY IS EVERYTHING SO STUPID?!?! And where is the common sense in this world?
Brandon called the grandmother on the way home to chat about baby shower things... and guess what? We forgot her birthday. Guess what? That's kinda a Big Deal. And I had no idea. See... in my family... birthdays are only a real big deal when you're a kid. And my mom NEVER bought cards, because she considered them a waste of money (seriously! $5 for canned sentiment? I agree). So, of course, I assume that everybody thinks that way. Ummm, no. Apparently not. And guess who feels reeeally bad? Me. Because I keep track of our little family's calendar and never really paid attention to anyone's birthdays, including my own family (sorry, guys, I show my love in other ways). IT'S MY FAULT. Ps - Brandon was not blaming me; he told me not to worry about it; I just felt bad.
If that's not enough, we hear that the in-laws (my husband's parents) that I have never met + the twin brother + his wife that haven't spoken to us since our engagement + the nephew we have never met are going to spend time with the grandmother. Another reminder that we're shunned. Being shunned is like a knife in the back that hurts less until someone gives the knife a twist every once in a while. Then the sting is quite acute.
It's not that I was upset or angry or frowning... just furrowing my brow and scrunching my nose and remembering... there are bad days. It's just life. Life is hard. Troubles come. People act stupid. We have to do hard things and things we don't want to and have to deal with difficult situations. Nobody said life would be easy. Our job is to keep on holdin' on. Keep our hearts fixed. Steadfast. Rock-solid. On Jesus.
Steadfast. I love that word. If you want encouragement, study the word "steadfast" in Scripture. I'd tell you all about it and give you all my favorite verses, but this is not a spoonfeed-you-with-my-personal-encouragement blog post. Go look it up yourself. It's pretty awesome.
"My heart, O God, is steadfast (FIXED),
My heart is steadfast.
I will sing and make music."
My consolation as this Saturday 'Day of the Furrowed Brow' came to a close?
Sunday's on the way. And I am gonna praise. :)
And a more practical consolation came in the form of a text from a friend, offering to stop by with homemade Nutella and strawberry tarts. She didn't know that it was a furrowed brow day, but she was just being herself and giving liberally. Thank You, Lord, for creating food that tastes good and inspiring people to give when it's needed, even when they don't know it! We smiled big as we munched those delicious tarts. :D