Minding My Own Business8:00 AM
Minding my own business makes life easier.
Life gets complex when I'm worrying about you. You see, I have this problem. I'm a fixer. I'm a problem-solver and an "it-can't-be-that-hard" kinda person. I want to have the conversation, offer the solution and see resolution. I want to help you make a lifestyle change. I want the "shock & awe" if that is required. I want to smack your face and hug your neck and call you cured. I want to hit you with three versions of the Bible AND my concordance, and seriously, HOW IS THIS A BAD PLAN?! ... And right now, everyone is counting their blessings that the lesson I'm talking about is the lesson that keeps them from experiencing my "fixing" on a daily basis, because of my learned skill of not saying everything that I think and the further censor of my wise-and-sympathetic-to-everyone husband.
Anyway, I am this way. I am a fixer. Maybe I shouldn't even call it my "problem," since I'm sure that God designed me this way. My challenge is learning how to use this tendency for good. AND learning how to live in such a way that I am not in a constant state of inner soul uproar!
Let's take a few steps backwards.
Before my husband stops me from making unnecessary waves.
Before the Spirit checks me to be slow to speak.
Before I put energy into finding a solution for something.
Before my heart races, and my mood plummets, and I'm sad-just plain sad- about someone else's life...
I take a step back, and tell myself, "mind your own business."
Now before you go all hyper-spiritual on me and talk about how we need to address each others' weaknesses and that's what the Body is for, let me just say that this does not apply to the 1% of the time where I need to put more prayer/thought/time into considering a situation and see where the Lord directs my steps.
I believe in the necessity of true relationship before rebuke.
I believe in waiting to be asked before giving advice (read: advice is different than orders).
I believe that most of the time, the most intimate rebuke/help/honesty comes from the most intimate relationship (this is what I have a Godly husband for).
I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about an unhealthy fascination with other peoples' lives. The Bible calls this being a "busybody." This is being busy about the wrong things. And facebook (the internet in general) makes this easy. Because 99% of the time, facebook tells me information that I do not need to know. And I get sad. And then I remember that if I'm only hearing about people on facebook, I don't have a real relationship with them anyway. And then I seriously consider killing the facebook machine in my life (I'm getting awfully close to this solution).
It doesn't really matter TO ME what choices that you make.
In the most practical sense, I have some business to take care of. My business. Not your business. If I'm busy worrying about your business, then I won't be able to take care of my business.
If I'm in an uproar about your choices, whether about parenting or convictions or how often you go to church or whether or not you like me, then I can't spend enough time considering my life choices.
In simpler words, worrying about your life makes me unable to be a good steward of my resources: the resources of my thoughts, emotions, decisions, energy, etc. Worry about you affects my own obedience to God.
So hey, I'm gonna mind my own business today. And tomorrow. And the next day. Isn't that great? :)
Minding my own business does not mean that I don't love "my peoples." I love my friends and family. I care for acquaintances. I'm interested in you and I'm interested in the building blocks of your lives--your hobbies, interests, family, jobs, things that make you smile, things that make you hurt and everything that makes your life yours. But I wanna hear about those things while our friendships grow. Not from facebook, or the internet or because I wanna fix you. Just because I love you. So let's be friends.
Maybe over a cup of tea?