Intent of Marriage

I couldn't help laughing last night, as The Little Bro compared marriage with buying a car. There was a good point to that whole conversation. Though I won't go into it right now. But marriage and the pursuit of marriage occupies a bit of my time and thoughts and prayer. So I want to "pontificate" (as The Pastor would say) on this subject for a little while.

I'm not going to debate the Christian methods of pursuing marriage. I don't have the time or energy, other than to say that you ought to pursue marriage in a way that honors Christ. In holiness, purity and without distracting yourself from the pursuit of Christ. I know it's possible because I've seen it done.

What I do want to focus on is intent or focus of a young man or woman. The world's focus in relationships is generally motivated by selfishness. Girls just want someone to hold them and tell them that they're beautiful. Guys just want the hottest girl ever. Yes, I'm stereotyping. Yes, I'm right. Just listen to the voice of the world. It's screaming this message from every headline and movie and magazine cover. Girls want someone to fulfill every desire of their heart for security and affection. Guys want someone to fulfill their physical needs and make their egos grow. But that's not the point!

Seeking marriage should to be motivated by the desire to please God and serve others. Notice is the lack of ME involved in that sentence. It's not about ME. It's all about God. It's not about some guy pleasing me and meeting my needs. It's about me making a covenant with God to honor, submit and serve my husband for the rest of my life. That will require the constant crucifixion of my flesh. I don't know this from experience (yet), but I do know what the Word says. Learning to live with youth people for a week is hard enough without the flesh manifesting--I'm sure marriage is like 100x more difficult.

Don't misunderstand me... I'm not saying that marriage has nothing to do with affection or sex or anything like that. It has everything to do with that! The intent of marriage is about service to God and mutual service to one another (because service to one another IS service to God). If I'm fully devoted to serving my husband and he's fully devoted to loving me as Christ loved the Church, then everybody's happy--right? Theoretically, yes. But the key to this whole arrangement is the focus. If I'm focused on Christ, then when my husband fails, as all humans do one time or another, I won't retaliate or be sinful in my thoughts, attitudes or actions. I will love unselfishly and sacrificially. Yeah, I think I have alot to learn on this subject and God has been stretching me recently in my love of people, especially family and friends. Surely, this is the best preparation for marriage.

To close this thing up... Avoid worldliness, especially in guy/girl relationships. Guard your heart. Sift your focus and make sure that it is pleasing to the Lord, and not simply about pleasing yourself. And God will be glorified!